I used to wonder why so many parables and lessons in the Bible were about plants. I think I get it now. It’s culturally relevant no matter where we are in time. Even if we don’t live in an agrarian society, we can still marvel at the beauty of plants. Some of us have gardens or flower boxes. Some may just admire the image of still plants, or artificial ones. However the point is this, WE GET IT.
My journey, my seed, can physically be linked to my conception…but this adult journey is linked to surrender. It was my surrender to God that placed me in a hearing space. I was thirsty to hear from HIM. I wanted to be pleasing to God. That meant taking off some old things.
If you have been a visitor for any length of time on my blog, you understand that I am very clear about my transparency. There is something that comes up every year about this time. CELIBACY. The dictionary defines celibate as such: a person who abstains from sexual relations. You know what I often hear? Something to the tune of “I really respect that” and the suitor then Olympic-style sprints in the opposite direction. Oh and the forever loud banner of, “I can’t do that”. This next segment speaks to the Christians, the Believers, and the Disciples of Christ: newsflash, YOU CAN, if you want to.
Sex is one of the sins that doesn’t suck immediately. It’s a flesh fix. It gratifies a hunger and thirst momentarily. Let’s face it you have a goal, whether it’s to gratify your fix (or serve the other person theirs), it’s a lot of blissful work for a few seconds of pleasure. For most, sex is your drug of choice. Say what you want, it’s a drug. There is a clinical term for those addicted to sex that impairs functioning. We don’t have a term for those who just enjoy it so much that we modify our lives around it. We “norm” sex. As believers, we can find a plethora of scriptures reminding us, and chastising us, to keep sex confined to a marital covenant. Sex was designed to be a wonderful experience between a man and a woman joined together in a forever marriage. Nope, not up for a law filled debate, this is based on scripture. Sex, lust, drugs, gluttony, greed can all be linked to a flesh fix, and they aren’t the only ones. They don’t immediately suck because they give us what we want…right? They feed the urge. However, it’s temporary. When we engage in something that lulls us to the very thing we want, with no bullet in a gun against us, we are in a constant chase for the proverbial carrot. I disagree with the fight fire with fire cliché. Fight fire with WATER.
We choose to not sacrifice the urge. We choose to give in and not pick up our cross and walk. It’s a choice. If it were a need, most of us would not have made it out of elementary school. I also understand that some have already gotten “lost in the sauce” and will tell me it’s difficult. YES, I KNOW. I really do, because for ten years I actively participated. I had sex a lot. Not with a billion people, but countless time with the individual I was in a relationship (or situationship) at the time. It doesn’t matter if it was one time or a million times, I stopped because I was tired of being a hypocrite. The urge didn’t die and honestly it’s still difficult. This March makes four years since I made my decision. I have come dangerously close to a full blow mess up. In some ways, I have messed up. However, there is such a thing as beginning again.
I am always encouraged to find others on a journey to sprout new growth. I am always excited to find believers who really are looking forward to living by design. Those who will savor the moment that they are in, and then let loose once the covenant is established. Yes, let loose. You better believe I plan to make my husband happy in all areas, including sexually. (Insert scripture about the undefiled marital bed) I am not a lone forest. I am not even a blossom in full bloom. I am a humble green sprout seeking to flourish around others who finally get it. No. Some sin doesn’t feel like pain. Sometimes the sin can take you higher than you have ever been before. But there is one thing that I can assure you, the drop off at the end WILL suck.